It's kinda sad my July wasn't meant to be what I wanted -- Eventful. With very limited left to spend, I had to save as much as possible. I still have to spend though, or else I might really die from excessive self-home-grounded syndrome. Hm.... What activities to do which don't have to spend much/at all? Hm...
Convocation is really just 3 days away, but whether my parents are going is really a question. I'm not really concerned though, whether they're really going, just hope they are healthy and cheerful. Mum's condition really not that good. I've no idea what I can do already. At times, I felt really angry at her, how can she let it devouring her? How can she not doing anything about it? I can't see the desire and determination in her eyes to be better again. All I can see is a pair of eyes reflecting self-pity and waiting someone/something to cure her. I always believe one should have the control over his/her own mind unless against Alzheimer's disease. No way should a depression be so easily taken over the control of the whole body. Sometimes, her slothful and sloppy look really irritates me. It's not that she can't move, it's not that she's injured, she is in fact, physically well. Ok, enough spitting of my negative thoughts.
It's a challenge for me. The level just gets higher and higher. I need to find my way deep into your mind and find out what exactly is wrong inside. The source has to be the key. I'll free you from your cell of darkness. But I'm telling you... Don't ever give up. FIGHT!
私の心はあなたの手にあるので...
